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Friday, June 23rd, 2006
I ain't rounding up shit! But the other parts are partially accurate, as I consider this current point in time to be pre-holiday as I already had to do some work today (more precisely, I had to start organising a team so that I didn't end up with some foreign cunt with a name like SIVAGANESH GUNASEELAN, which is seriously a name and I just cannot fathom it).

Exams are gay, this is the end of the first part.

Umm holidays are kind of boring but awesome so that's the second part!


Now I can finally finish that stuff for Josh that I was supposed to do like 1.5 months ago or some shit and got mostly completed! I'll get like 200 bucks for that so I can finally pay off my debt to society (parents) and to my super fund (parents). Money is really giving me the shits lately, it's so boring. I bought HITMAN: BLOOD MONEY last week so I'm finally going to get to play it, I've already got "THE GHOST" as my rating for the first level so we'll see how long I can keep up not shooting cunts in the skull... oh wait, too late, I shot about 20 niggers in the head in the first level and I even got to use one of them as a body shield!

Oh well, time to go back to doing nothing I suppose!!!!!!! I'm only going to have a week of doing absolutely nothing since I have a deferred exam and want to study for it a lot so this is contending for the most boring sentence ever.

Hahaha I'm already fucking bored, this is hilarious! OH WELL TOKYO DRIFT

current mood: bored

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Monday, June 19th, 2006
How can I remember the exact date or even what my name is when I have made such an amazing discovery? This discovery is not for everyone and I suspect the people that it is not for have several baskets short of a picnic or perhaps a laundry that uses a basket system for the collection of clothes or they have just lost several baskets and they enjoy baskets (who doesn't enjoy a good basket especially when it is not a euphemistic term?). If you are sans basket then perhaps renew your subscription to Baskets Weekly, eagerly await your mail order delivery and come back when you are prepared OR delve right into this insanity pit of crazed delusion and magical discovery.

You know, the funny thing is I don't even know what the discovery is yet but I think I've improperly hyped it up because it is possibly quite boringCollapse )

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Sunday, June 18th, 2006
12:06 am - yeah i haven't updated suck a dick
I've been too fucking busy with studying and pretending to be studying but actually being an asshole on the Internet to post anything here, and also just kind of had nothing to fucking write about since I can't even remember why.

I just wanted to take this time out to say this: (Disclaimer: Possibly I am going to offend some readers who might take what I am saying as some kind of personal attack but it is has nothing to do with anyone I know personally so you'll just have to suck it up or stop fucking reading because I am in a shit mood possibly due to not enough sleep.)

I seriously fucking hate people who go on about TRAVELLING. I'm not against travelling, it'd probably be fun even though I never fucking do it. My reasons for hating how people go on about travelling have nothing to do with my lack of it, it has everything to do about it being a fucking boring cunt of a subject. Oh wow you went to some place and you did some shit? Yeah I fucking went down to the shops and did some shit too but you don't see me having a fucking orgasmic masturbatory session over it. I don't give a shit about where you went, because about 10 billion other cunts have been there before. OH YOU WENT TO SOME ASIAN COUNTRY? OH YES IT IS FUCKING SPECTACULAR HOW THERE ARE A BUNCH OF GOOKS WHO LIVE THERE AND ARE TOO FUCKING SLANT-EYED TO SEE WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON AND TOURISTS JUST LIKE YOU WHO ARE GOING TO COME HOME AND TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THEIR AMAZING JOURNIES TO CHONGCENTRAL. Most of the time these faggots have friends who do the same fucking thing so they don't risk losing them from rambling on about their boring tripe.

Travel journals are fucking annoying too. OK, so you want to keep a record of what you did and where you went and blah blah fuckity blah. If you're just writing about where you went and what you saw and not anything that has any merit or excitement then why the fuck do I care? The only people who would ever read over such inane and banal shit probably spend friday nights planning their day of shopping for a new vase to go with the rest of the decor of their home because what if I buy the wrong vase and the flow of the room is completely wrong and I won't be able to wank on about it when I invite endless boring cunts over for a dinner party where we can discuss our travels and plans for travels while drinking red wine even though we fucking hate it?????????? So then the only other people left to read it are everyone else, and if you are genuinely interested in reading a travel journal I suggest you shove a walrus cock up your ass to shock you into reality (sadly this may excite you and motivate you to create your own travel journal if you are a faggot).

Goddamn I could probably go on about this but I can't be bothered. My parents keep talking about the shit they did in Italy or Hawaii and every time they talk about it it's the same old shit and I feel so bad for being such a cunt in my head going "SHUT THE FUCK UP I DON'T CARE" and just kind of going "Hmm" out loud so as not to hurt their feelings.



current mood: cranky

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Monday, May 22nd, 2006
1:27 pm - THIS IS perhaps my first universty post
I'm not sure, but it really is quite possibly my first post written while at this university. I'm just trying to kill half an hour until my stupid fucking lecture on stupid fucking shit, where I'll sit and make fun of the lecturer for 2 hours whilst trying to stifle laughter.

Speaking of stifling laughter, the IBM careers seminar thing was held just then, and I left feeling exceedingly confident! Basically, in question time I got about 90-95% of the eye contact from the speaker, and then afterwards I ensured that I monopolised his time and fed him propaganda (OR TRUTHS?) about how awesome I am. I felt kind of bad for taking up all of his time, but everyone was kind of just hanging back and going "HE HE... HE" or something. Honestly I forget what, but there was some irish dude whose accent I was imitating in my head (and for all of you stupid girls who love those stupid accents he looked like a frog with thinning hair so keep your panties dry).

Oh right, stifling laughter. At one stage he said something about "showing kids that IT isn't just for nerds" and I was cracking up inside, because you have to be a fucking nerd to do well with software. Then at another point I was running through the episode of Gilmore Girls that I watched at about 3 in the morning trying to get to sleep (I got 3 hours sleep), and I kept flashing to "This town is weeeird and full'a jerks!" Trying to hold that laugh in was a marathon effort.

Shit, I even wore a fucking nice shirt and everything, and all these other nerds turned up in boardshorts and raincoats or something, honestly terrible. Turns out the dress code for the lab is casual as fuck so that's good. When I turned up to the room this morning (after 20 minutes of pondering, wandering and pooing myself [literally] due to nerves created by the unknown nature of the seminar), I tried to do the "regular" thing by talking to these nerdy cunts with the old "Are you here for the (such and such) thing?", to which they replied "Yeah." Then I had no clue what to say to nerdy cunts because I never have a clue about what to say to them in general, and I said "I was afraid that I was going to be underdressed or something, maybe I'd turn up and everyone would be wearing a bowtie" and this one dude laughed and the other nerd cunts just fucking made this grunty noise like they're too good to dignify my witticisms with a proper response. Goddamn, it's either social awkwardness or extreme fucking unfounded arrogance. When the question time came about, he asked something about working in teams? HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE ON THE TEAM? HOW MANY TEAMS ARE THERE? ARE THERE TEAMS? WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE TEAM? MY FAVOURITE TEAM IS TEAM COCKSINBUTT!!! Honestly, big fucking faggot questions.

So yeah, I got out, tried to call mum but no answer, tried to call sister but no answer, and by the time I got to talk to them my excitement had worn off so I just told them that it was heat of the moment and I had nothing to say. Now I'm changed out of my "fancy" shirt into my "boris" "shirt" which is more "comfortable". Then I had some really bad teppanyaki and now I'm here. Jesus christ this is the worst (or possibly best!) entry I've ever written (or just average!). (Fuck!)

So YEAH, there's a big chance that I'll be working for IBM and it'll fucking rule from the sounds of it! Now I need to hand in an application that is due NEXT WEDNESDAY, AND NOT SEPTEMBER LIKE I FUCKING READ SOMEWHERE A MONTH OR TWO AGO. NOTE TO SELF: READ SHIT MORE AND BETTER. Now I need academic results and they take 10 days minimum and I have 9 and ugh~~



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Saturday, May 20th, 2006
5:04 pm - HELL YES
Hell yes I got a new haircut, and hell yes I'm going to take pictures of it because I am severely procrastinating.


current mood: cheerful

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Friday, May 19th, 2006
12:55 am
You listen to the fucking shitiest metal in existance

How could someone be so insensitive?! Everyone knows I hate bad spelling unless it is purely intentional!


current mood: FUCKING BORED

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Wednesday, May 17th, 2006
2:51 pm - send $1 to happy dude!

I've not posted in a while, for various reasons. Firstly I was/still am too busy with assignments to do much other than occasionally breathe and aim my butt over a toilet and hope to hell that I forgot pants whilst I attempt defecating (please note that I have taken a break here to perform this task right now, and I currently am wearing pants so here's hoping that they fall off on the trip there... OK they did). I've still managed to watch all of Season 1 and a third of Season 2 of Gilmore Girls, and am eagerly awaiting seasons 3 & 4 being released early July! I'm gay!

Anyway, a bunch of shit has happened and I honestly forget most of it. Between my last post and now I have decided to, next year, buy my original attainable dream car, a HR32 GT-R Skyline. Gun metal grey, as original as I can possibly get it. It might be a bit more money, but it's just such a fucking awesome car that I'm willing to spend a little extra effort and money to be driving a rather influential and fantastic automobile. There's still room for change, and depending on the circumstances when it comes to actually buying my next car I may opt for an SW20 MR2 GT instead, but I've wanted the 32 for the past few years and was severely disappointed when I thought that I wasn't going to be able to get one. Maybe I'll be living at home longer, but I honestly don't give a fuck at the moment because my current goals don't see any necessity for living away from home.

Speaking of goals, I'm going to an IBM Careers and Products seminar on Monday at uni, so I'll be putting several foots in several doors and hoping that I don't mistake a butt for a door and put my foot in a butt (unless it is an IBM employer and they enjoy such things, in which case I certainly hope I do!). Assignments are pretty gay the end.

Not the end! I just bought 9 albums for 5 FUCKING AUSTRALIAN FUCKING DOLLARS FUCKING EACH FUCKING RIGHT FUCKING THEN! A few of them are probably going to suck, but who fucking cares when they're 5 bucks? Desert Sessions 9 & 10, Electric Wizard, Today Is The Day, Yob, All Out War, Fu Manchu (possibly boring), Monster Magnet (possibly gay and boring), The Fucking AM (could suck about 24 cocks but it's GOLD), and Callisto... I honestly have no fucking idea who they are whatsoever, and they could be fucking gay symphonic nu-metal faggot shit but WHO FUCKING CARES WHEN THEY'RE 5 BUCKS?!?!?!!!! Monster Magnet was reduced from 38 bucks, and the rest were reduced from about 25-32 bucks, so I'm pretty happy about the music even though it's quite possible that I'll end up in a fit of rage over the magnitude of faggotry presented by the unknown melodies.

Ummm, my Pig Destroyer hoodie isn't in yet, but they have a Medium so I said to send out a Medium because it's the same as my Mastodon hoodie, so I should have that in a couple of weeks. I know that this post is focusing a lot on material things and they aren't going to truly make me happy but I'm looking for love in all the wrong places and the cat's in the cradle with the silver spoon.


current mood: busy

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Monday, May 8th, 2006
I just had to ask for another day to work on my assignment, because I'm seriously not in any real condition to be doing anything other than sitting in bed and complaining about not being in any real condition to be doing anything other than sitting in bed and complaining about (INFINITE LOOP).

Oh well, I had some other shit to say but I can't remember anything!!!!!!!!!


current mood: sick

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Friday, May 5th, 2006
As a small addendum to my last post:

I just spent about 2 hours singing karaoke with my dad while mum sat there and watched because she's a chicken!

That was some funny shit hahaha. They'd never heard My Sacrifice by Creed, nor Come Sail Away by Styx. Pity the song choice is FUCKIN' SHIT on the pov-ass home device we have (actually it's just the songs, the thing we use is fine).

My rendition of Born To Be Wild may have scared neighbours if they actually heard it, which is a great possiblity.

I also ordered the US version of Pink directly from Southern Lord on eBay, and noticed that the seller information listed none other than Greg Anderson. I said hello, commended them on being awesome, and on sunn 0))), and on Mr. O'Malley's fucking fantastic artwork, aaand then said for them to come to Australia. What's the bet he doesn't ever read it or get told about it? ;_;

Also to Iain: I'd have ordered you a copy but I wasn't sure whether you liked the Japanese cover or the US cover so I DIDN'T FUCKING DO ANYTHING SO I AM SORRY YOU MISS OUT ON NAKED JESUS THING COVER.

current mood: hahahah ow my throat hurts!

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Thursday, May 4th, 2006
Whenever I leave the house I come back with about a million things that happened that I thought were hilarious/

Holy fucking shit, Dad's actually singing karaoke now and I'm fucking pissing myself. When I came home I heard very loud music from the street, which is weird since the house is a fair way from the street for various logistical reasons (big house big land big lawn). I assumed instantly that he was drunk after going to the thai restaurant with Mum, but it was just him listening to Johnny Cash at an eardrum-bursting decibel level. Now he really is singing karaoke, and I can't help but think it's because I put the idea in his head after mentioning what I thought the noise was. He's doing better, but he needs to loosen up or stop being shit. Go Dad.

Anyway, I had to stop to write that. As I was saying previously, lots of fun shit happens to me.

I hadn't driven a long distance in a while, so that plus listening to Orange Goblin PLUS an assortment of people in cars that shit me off for various reasons, equals driving fast. Some dude in an old ford put his high beams on, as if I'm singling him out and going "Ah, I'm going to cut him off!" It's a space issue, man, you're leaving a gap in front of you and I'm capitalising on the excess space situation like any good motorist (read: mostly just me) would do. There's something in my head that just snaps, then suddenly I'm trying to prove to other cars that I'm going to do things twice as hardcore as they will, so woops.

Some chinese cunt was blocking me from merging (it was last-minute but necessary and quite unforeseen), so then I beeped my horn and started trying to get his attention with angry face and angry clicks. Obviously he got the picture even though he just kept looking straight ahead, and then no less than 3 cunts pushed in front of me. I'd explain it more but IDONTWANNA.

In the elevator at the parking structure, as I was going to class, I looked up at the ceiling and noticed that someone had quite eloquently scribed "FUKN CUNTS" there. My sentiments exactly, phantom author. That got me, but I couldn't laugh too hard because I swear the two women in the lift with me thought I was some kind of scumbag.

Well, that's about all there is now. I just realised that I have a swollen, scratchy throat from my cold, so it's probably best that I steer clear from the karaoke, as painful as Dad's voice is. END COMMUNICATION.

current mood: i'm ok but this cold sucks ass

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11:37 am - ...and so ends the Mystery of the Haunted Trailer!

As an aside, I've noticed that a lot of my moods from my entries may portray a negative picture about my state of mind in general, but I'm really relatively quite dandy. Apart from my foot havings pins and needles. Why I laugh?

current mood: sick

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Saturday, April 29th, 2006
I was thinking about taking some pictures today of my new shirt, and then I figured I'd take some myspace-looking pictures like a fuckin' poof so I went right ahead and did that, prompted by maceo asking for them since she's never seen any (and I realise most people haven't either).

So I give you


Man I'm fucking hungry and gay.

current mood: lazy

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2:36 am
The Hills Have Eyes was actually really fucking awesome. There were a few instances where you had to suspend disbelief, but other parts were genuinely creepy and borderline disturbing.

Some girl said that my Pig Destroyer shirt was "fucking rad" (I can't remember what she said, but she was good looking so I just said thank you and kept walking, plus she touched my elbow and that's weird) so that was cool. Saw some shitty fucking hardcore wannabe local fuckface band at the basement, since my cousin's high school friends were there and called out to me. The stupid thing is, they called out my name, then I get over there and they don't fucking say anything? Plus there was some girl with them and I swear I knew her face (EVEN IAIN SAID THIS) and she kept talking to me and it was kind of weird. I'll find out who the hell she is one of these days. Maybe tomorrow!

Now today I have to take an exam that I know absolutely nothing about. At least it's the best mark out of two exams, so fuck that stupid shit. I'll go and write a story about a snake getting legs and fucking a cactus or something, it's just such a drag~

NOW I'M OFF TO SLEEPY LAND WHERE I CAN FORGET MY WOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I obtain new woes in my slumber.

current mood: cynical

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Friday, April 28th, 2006
3:31 am
I'm not even sure what the hell a free prose is, but since my understanding of it is me sitting here and typing random shit, it's not actually any different from any other day of my life. Well, last night I decided that I would start to write something that perhaps made little sense compared to the normal content of my journal. My heightened state of shittiness - the cause of which is more than likely the drugs I took without a lot of food that should be taken with a lot of food - begs me to create something spectacularly fucking shit. Why don't I just become a professional writer? I'd die, that's fucking why, Brad.

I wrote this for Jasmine, it is a poem about ants. I call it ANTS.


central hive mind
the colony lifeblood
art imitating society
imitating you

swarming all wildlife
capture what you kill
kill the captured
carry 10 times your bodyweight
or some fucking shit
you're an ant
like fucking robocop

invade this gathering
picnics are where you go a lot
you cunt fuckers
get out of my picnic
ants are gay

current mood: ANTS IN PANTS

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Wednesday, April 26th, 2006
9:49 pm - SON, THIS IS MRS. BURNS!
I got a 3-day extension for my assignment. Now I just have to get the motivation to start doing anything again, because I'm still in relaxation mode after extreme sheizen mode. Some PUNX girl at the chicken shop was looking at me a lot so that was funny. Using my amazing extra sensory perception, I foresaw my extension being granted and celebrated by buying Morbid Florist by Anal Cunt and The Mosquito Control EP by Isis, but I really should have bought happiness because that's much more fun!

Whenever I envision my future life I'm always wearing a shirt and tie and driving somewhere really fast. Seriously, always the same thing. It's getting a bit boring.

current mood: unmotivated! YEE

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Tuesday, April 25th, 2006
11:40 am - FUCK YOU WORLD
Now that I am no longer feeling awful in the stomach, and haven't gone to the toilet in about 20 or so hours, I am quite happy!

EXCEPT for one little thing.


All I fucking want is to get on a jury and either get kicked off of a jury or send someone to jail forever, but no!

I can deal with my insides being raped by the spirit of christmas pain past but this just makes me angry.

current mood: busy

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Monday, April 24th, 2006
12:43 pm
Hello everyone I must apologise in advance for ignoring you because I feel like I am going to give birth through my rectum any minute now and maybe also throw up a baby at the same time!

If I kill myself please bury me at makeout creek.

EDIT I have an infection that is apparently going around, woo!

current mood: sick

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Thursday, April 20th, 2006
4:33 am - I was strolling through the fooog one daaay
I've spent the last 5 or 6 hours trying to finish this stupid fucking work for Josh, and I still haven't finished it. I'm already way over what I said it would take, and there's probably another few hours in it. It's pretty much shitting me off, and I'm doing it for peanuts so I'm allowed to complain like hell on here because I have to be nice as pie when I'm not writing shit here.

Here is a thing I stole from maceo because I'm tired as fuck.


I stuck to the pile of albums sitting next to me, most of which I seemed to accumulate over the past 6 months. I've got 8 more coming from eBay too aaaaaahhhh! AAAAH! Ones that I bought previous to 2004 really sucked ass, bar a few, so oh well. I'm going to be broke forever at this rate.

current mood: drained

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Tuesday, April 18th, 2006
Since I am sitting here doing a boring as shit assignment, I decided to help out on the discussion board for the assignment since there were a few unanswered questions! Turns out that my class is a bunch of idiots!

Heading: About appending details from vote to file.
Added By: Desmond
Date: Sun, Apr 16 06

Hi, I have a loop to count every line in the the votes file in order to get the last vote number so that I can increment one to it for the next vote. The problem is whenever I appended data to the file, it appends itself to the file ONLY after it leaves a blank line which goes something like this.

1;2;3;...............1; ' Last line. ' Blank line. 1;2;1;5;............4; ' Line will only appends here. 1;2;1.................4; 'Next new line appends here which is fine.

Therefor my loop will only count to the last line eg. 43942 and treat it as end of file and I am unable to increase the count anymore. :(

Here is an example of my loop.

Do Until strLine = Nothing intCounter = intCounter + 1 strLine = strReadLines.ReadLine() Loop

Here is the method i use to append the data.

StreamWriterSW = File.AppendText("textfile")

So. is there anyway to append data without leaving a new/blank line?

Regards Desmond

I'm in a helpful mood, so I overlook the fact that his code snippets are atrocious and feel that perhaps my assistance could prove to be valuable to this young gentleman who may actually be very old and stupid!

Heading: Re: About appending details from vote to file.
Date: Tue, Apr 18 06

Do you have just 1 blank line at the end of your file? I think it's a problem with the format of your file rather than any code you've written.

I've tested using both the File.AppendText() method AND the StreamWriter constructor with the boolean append argument (which, I think, would be the preferred way to perform the task even though it provides essentially the same functionality). It worked both ways for me, so the only thing I can think of is that you have 2 blank lines at the end of your file instead of 1.

Another explanation is ghosts in your computer, and in that case I cannot help you.

Hopefully he does not e-mail me because I will track him down and kill him with a butcher's knife! Ho ho!

current mood: helpful! :) :) :)

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Monday, April 17th, 2006
I ate too much chocolate and had to shit a lot this morning.

It is still happening a little bit aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!

current mood: poopy

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